Keep You Company

We all have times in our lives that the situation is so terribly difficult that we ask ourselves: when is this going to end?

At times, it is so bad that we got stuck in this dark, endless tunnel that we won't even ask that question because we think 'this is not gonna end. I'm never gonna recover and be happy again.'
It doesn't matter what people say anymore because we just don't see the hope or possibility of those 'nice things that could happen' on us as people around us try to convince us with.
We just lost any hope and don't know what to believe in.

When people around us keep on saying cliches that we have already heard a million times, something that we don't believe in anymore, we feel like shouting back at them or punch them on their faces.
But then 'why bother?'; we don't even have the energy to do so because we're so self-absorbed in the storm inside our brains and the brokenness in our hearts that every ounce of our energy is drained.

Sometimes I feel like: these people have no idea what they are talking about, they've no idea about my life.

Then I think: maybe sometimes my readers would feel the same way towards me. Perhaps my 'preaching' about positivity and saying things like 'love yourself and embrace life' etc, are all just bullshit and cliche as well?

Well, maybe it is. 

I never wanted to try make anyone believe in anything.
I never wanted to teach anyone about how they should live their lives. 

Who am I to give advices like that? 

No one can stay forever in another person's life, but I hope I can be a few people's companion at certain points of their lives.
Never wanted to change someone's life because it is simply too egotistic a thought to think that a person can change someone else's life.
But I do hope that I can have a little bit of positive impact to people I care, whose life I might only have very slightly touched upon.
I hope you would try to be positive because I want you to have inner peace, if not happiness.
Why would I want you to be happy?
Because everyone deserves that and I know how painful it is to live without happiness and the hope for it.
And, I have faith in you. 

I believe wholeheartedly that a companion is more important than a coach.

Sometimes people are more emotionally connected and communicate more when they share a silent moment, than during a heated discussion.

I guess I really have no idea what you went/are going through, but no matter how bad the situation is or how bad you feel, I just want you to remember: 

You are not alone. :)

Love & hug,
N

P.S. Having a bad time in my relationship.

It's like every 2 days he finds sth new to get mad at me, that I have to apologize and be sorry about, or else he won't talk to me and keep on getting mad at me for days.

Not that I'm not serious about our relationship, but sometimes I find this so ridiculous/funny and I don't know what to do.

I couldn't help thinking, 'what have I done wrong again? Am I such a terrible girlfriend?
I don't know, maybe I am...

Then I got confused:
How could a guy who just said that I'm 'the perfect girl in the world', demands my apology for not queuing up for him at the clinic or meeting him afterwards, or else he won't talk to me because he thinks I'm not a trustworthy or caring person?

Really? Have I made such a 'big mistake' that I 'have to apologize' or else he just can't even talk to me? Seriously?

Why can't people accept the fact that no one is perfect?

Well maybe I should just stop being so 'stubborn or selfish and just apologize' whenever he wishes.
Or maybe I should just suck it up and accept the fact that "our relationship just got into another stage, we are so stable, just like the relationship of any other 'normal' people" (another stage? normal? I don't even know what that mean!)

Ok, no more bitching coz I'm still gonna fight for it anyway.
Well, pretty much like everybody else.
And I'm gonna tell myself exactly what I want you to say to yourself:
I'm not alone. :)