Dear readers,
Lovely to see you again. It has been a long while since I last updated.
I spent the last two months in 2 countries and when I was back, I have so much to share that I simply didn't know what to write!
After resting for some time, finally I'm ready to write posts again.
This time, on traveling together with someone you love.
Traveling together as a couple allows you to see the 'real face/side' of the person.
Lovely to see you again. It has been a long while since I last updated.
I spent the last two months in 2 countries and when I was back, I have so much to share that I simply didn't know what to write!
After resting for some time, finally I'm ready to write posts again.
This time, on traveling together with someone you love.
Traveling together as a couple allows you to see the 'real face/side' of the person.
It's easy to show your best side on a date, but maintaining it for 24hours and several days (in my case, weeks)? Not that easy.
It is true that you can glimpses of your partner in everyday life, but being there with him/her 24/7 shows you a lot more.
It is true that you can glimpses of your partner in everyday life, but being there with him/her 24/7 shows you a lot more.
So, couples that travel together stay together?
I don't know, but I am certainly aware of the fact that traveling together as a challenge for a couple.
This summer is the very first time that I travel with my boyfriend.
I am very glad that none of us imagined the trip to be a romantic all-perfect get-away.
Rather, we are well-awared of the countless possibilities for us to disagree.
We knew we are gonna fight at some point and tried very hard to avoid it.
Rather, we are well-awared of the countless possibilities for us to disagree.
We knew we are gonna fight at some point and tried very hard to avoid it.
It is good to expect the worst case scenario, because we ended up having very few arguments.
At least in my case, this trip has truly been an eye-opener in many ways.
Here I am to share with you what I learnt from this trip, on traveling together as a couple:
1) Know expectations, limits and non-negotiables of the both of you.
Examples:
- Different travel styles: He is good at planning ahead and arranging the sightseeing spots into a single route while I prefer getting lost and discovering the hidden gems.
- Different preferences: I can spend hours in art museums, bookstores, vintage shops, furniture and home decor shops and lovely small boutiques (of course!) while he would most definitely fall asleep in the corner.
- Non-negotiables: while I do not insist in staying at starred hotels, my top must-have is still the accommodation--a clean and safe place to stay, no shared bedroom/dorm room with strangers and no shared bathroom.
- Another less non-negotiable must have: fruits! Wherever I go, I need to check out the supermarkets or markets to get fresh fruits. I love it when my boyfriend take me to get fruits or spoil me by getting me some.
2) Have your own budget or a clear record of your expenditures.
I learned this the hard way. We shared a bank account but the money is mixed: some of his money, some of mine, some shared--all mixed together in one single bank account.
We agreed to track and keep a record of our spending, but I didn't do my part very well.
So at the end of the trip, we were not sure about how to split the money.
I felt bad about myself when he was not happy with the way I spent my money and the fact that I didn't keep a record of how much I spent.
Luckily, he didn't get mad about it and let money drive us into fights.
Suggestions? Don't make the mistake that I made.
Have a clear budget and a record, or maybe separate accounts to avoid arguing over money.
3) Trust.
It is exciting to be on a foreign soil. At the same time, stepping out of one's comfort zone is stressing.
Don't freak out or give up so easily. Let the other person take the lead.
Example:
- If the guy says he knows the way, let him navigate.
- No screaming in the car.
- Don't blame the other person.
4) Participate.
Taking the likely situation of getting lost, have you ever been in a situation where the guy said he knows the way BUT you are most certain that he is wrong?
Since we all know how much most men hate to ask for directions and how much most women hate to get lost (me excluded), the way I deal with it is:
- Let him navigate BUT keep your GPS or map handy
- Still follow his lead if he insists, even if you know the destination is at the opposite direction
- Don't wait till you walked/ drove too far to kindly tell him that you both went the wrong way and tell him the right way
- Never say 'see? I told you!' Never.
Being a girl who enjoys getting lost, I don't mind it at all. I actually love it-the thrill of exploring a new land
5) Openness, patience and acceptance. (And occasionally, forgiveness)
Since it is rare to find someone who shares the same living habits with us, be prepared to see the difference and the 'ugly' sides of your usually well-groomed and well-manned partner.
Examples: after a 12hr flight, being exhausted and hungry, lack of sleep, accidents, bad mood etc
Be patient and accept differences. Nobody is perfect.
Apart from knowing that my boyfriend is unbelievably patient, considerate, reliable and helpful, I know myself better too.
I know that I'm: the more messy one/ the one who overpacks/ seemingly-easygoing-but-actually-it's-laziness/ the-one-who-can-stay-up-very-late-but can't-wake-up-early etc etc. among the two of us.
I am grateful that most of my weaknesses are complemented by his strengths or vice versa.
And that he is very patient and accepting to me for who I am.
6) Appreciate.
There are lots of small things that you can do for each other, but don't forget to appreciate the other person's effort!
7) Relax and have fun!
Don't let trivial things ruin your mood.
It's perfectly normal to disagree and even argue. But always remember to make up.
The whole point of traveling together is to have fun together and enjoy each other's company!
That's about it, my little tips on how to travel with your partner and make sweet memories.
Oops! One more!
For those who are like me, those who couldn't pack very well: By ALL means, avoid over-packing.
Really, over-packing either break someone's back or break your bank. (think luggage overweight charge for flights or postal fee to mail a carton of things home)
Although I did all the carrying myself when I was alone, 99% of the time when I was with him, he did the carrying or moving luggages up the car/upstairs etc.
I really appreciate his help, feel well taken care of and admire him for being such a man.
But at the same time, I feel really guilty about this physical 'labour' he has to do, simply because I couldn't pack!
Viola! End of list.
Enjoy your trips!
Love,
N
Here I am to share with you what I learnt from this trip, on traveling together as a couple:
1) Know expectations, limits and non-negotiables of the both of you.
Examples:
- Different travel styles: He is good at planning ahead and arranging the sightseeing spots into a single route while I prefer getting lost and discovering the hidden gems.
- Different preferences: I can spend hours in art museums, bookstores, vintage shops, furniture and home decor shops and lovely small boutiques (of course!) while he would most definitely fall asleep in the corner.
- Non-negotiables: while I do not insist in staying at starred hotels, my top must-have is still the accommodation--a clean and safe place to stay, no shared bedroom/dorm room with strangers and no shared bathroom.
- Another less non-negotiable must have: fruits! Wherever I go, I need to check out the supermarkets or markets to get fresh fruits. I love it when my boyfriend take me to get fruits or spoil me by getting me some.
2) Have your own budget or a clear record of your expenditures.
I learned this the hard way. We shared a bank account but the money is mixed: some of his money, some of mine, some shared--all mixed together in one single bank account.
We agreed to track and keep a record of our spending, but I didn't do my part very well.
So at the end of the trip, we were not sure about how to split the money.
I felt bad about myself when he was not happy with the way I spent my money and the fact that I didn't keep a record of how much I spent.
Luckily, he didn't get mad about it and let money drive us into fights.
Suggestions? Don't make the mistake that I made.
Have a clear budget and a record, or maybe separate accounts to avoid arguing over money.
3) Trust.
It is exciting to be on a foreign soil. At the same time, stepping out of one's comfort zone is stressing.
Don't freak out or give up so easily. Let the other person take the lead.
Example:
- If the guy says he knows the way, let him navigate.
- No screaming in the car.
- Don't blame the other person.
4) Participate.
Taking the likely situation of getting lost, have you ever been in a situation where the guy said he knows the way BUT you are most certain that he is wrong?
Since we all know how much most men hate to ask for directions and how much most women hate to get lost (me excluded), the way I deal with it is:
- Let him navigate BUT keep your GPS or map handy
- Still follow his lead if he insists, even if you know the destination is at the opposite direction
- Don't wait till you walked/ drove too far to kindly tell him that you both went the wrong way and tell him the right way
- Never say 'see? I told you!' Never.
Being a girl who enjoys getting lost, I don't mind it at all. I actually love it-the thrill of exploring a new land
5) Openness, patience and acceptance. (And occasionally, forgiveness)
Since it is rare to find someone who shares the same living habits with us, be prepared to see the difference and the 'ugly' sides of your usually well-groomed and well-manned partner.
Examples: after a 12hr flight, being exhausted and hungry, lack of sleep, accidents, bad mood etc
Be patient and accept differences. Nobody is perfect.
Apart from knowing that my boyfriend is unbelievably patient, considerate, reliable and helpful, I know myself better too.
I know that I'm: the more messy one/ the one who overpacks/ seemingly-easygoing-but-actually-it's-laziness/ the-one-who-can-stay-up-very-late-but can't-wake-up-early etc etc. among the two of us.
I am grateful that most of my weaknesses are complemented by his strengths or vice versa.
And that he is very patient and accepting to me for who I am.
6) Appreciate.
There are lots of small things that you can do for each other, but don't forget to appreciate the other person's effort!
7) Relax and have fun!
Don't let trivial things ruin your mood.
It's perfectly normal to disagree and even argue. But always remember to make up.
The whole point of traveling together is to have fun together and enjoy each other's company!
That's about it, my little tips on how to travel with your partner and make sweet memories.
Oops! One more!
For those who are like me, those who couldn't pack very well: By ALL means, avoid over-packing.
Really, over-packing either break someone's back or break your bank. (think luggage overweight charge for flights or postal fee to mail a carton of things home)
Although I did all the carrying myself when I was alone, 99% of the time when I was with him, he did the carrying or moving luggages up the car/upstairs etc.
I really appreciate his help, feel well taken care of and admire him for being such a man.
But at the same time, I feel really guilty about this physical 'labour' he has to do, simply because I couldn't pack!
Viola! End of list.
Enjoy your trips!
Love,
N
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