An Answer

Sometimes I ask myself, 'why do people allow themselves to be stuck in relationships that they aren't thrilled about anymore?'

Whether it's from my observation or from what people tell me, I have yet to find an answer which I'm happy with.

Until one day, I figured....

We accept the love we think we deserve.


It doesn't mean we think of ourselves as better so we deserve better or more. 

Sometimes, it's the opposite -- sometimes we are afraid of asking for more.

'Asking for more' seems to make us a greedy person. And shouldn't us put people's happiness before ourselves? Especially when there is nothing to complain about the other person?

Perhaps we accept the love, not because the person is the right person--who sends electricity down our spines, who we think of whenever our minds wander, but simply because they do the right things that we think the right person would do.

The association we made: oh! He/she is doing the right thing, so he/she must be the right person!
Nothing but an illusion we create for ourselves.

When one day, we have doubts and ask ourselves, 'shouldn't I be crazily in love?' when we are not,
we say to ourselves 'don't be greedy, appreciate what you have'.

It's just sad. 

Telling ourselves that others have worse problems wouldn't change the fact that we are upset--even if somebody else has it much worse, that doesn't really change the fact that you have what you have.
Feelings are feelings.

But whether we act upon our feelings, that's a different story.
Most people don't, including myself. 
They just wait for it to go, which takes a long time if the feelings ever disappear.
Or they just kill those feelings.

In a sense, they kill part of themselves.

Love,
N